Home is where
the heart work is;
the washing of feet
turned tentative;
the argumentative patient;
the bargains struck with time.
And, home is where
the guilt grows large
and wash piles up
beside the machine;
where weeds green the garden
and tomatoes rot on the vine.
The ties that grind -
these homes of mine.
For Flash Fiction 55 at Real Toads
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Sunday, July 6, 2014
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About Me
- Maude Lynn
- Anybody who has survived his childhood has enough information about life to last him the rest of his days. ---Flannery O'Connor
26 comments:
Mama Zen--This was such a powerful piece. It could mean a million things to a million different readers, but what it most definitely speaks about is family ...and all the mess that entails.
Erm yes, it sounds a bit too familiar... Great use of irony and succinct choice of words.
Powerful indeed and no one says it better, MZ!!
"ties that grind"
that's perfect.
washing of feet instead of the laundry. this is ouchy-wonderful.
The image of "ties that grind" and "tomatoes rot on the vine" stayed with me. Powerful.
Beautifully and succinctly descriptive, and apt. So very hard. It's such a difficult mixed bag. You're doing great from the point of view of the very outside world, but know it's super hard. k.
I love the twist, the bargains struck with time, the ties that grind ~ Happy week MZ~
The ties that grind--this piece gets more gritty as I read it--great writing MZ!
"The ties that grind...." given all you are going through, laundry piling up should be the least of anyone's worries! And you can quote me, kiddo!
Twists and turns, binding ties ~ I get it.
Ah home. Such a conundrum. The place you most love to be, most want to leave, most want to come back to. You captured it well.
MZ,
This struck me as an apt description of those of us of a "certain age" with aging parents and dependent children of our own. Stuck caring for two generations. Hard, hard work.
wasnt it erma bombeck that said the ties that bind and gag...ha...yes, it is not always easy to serve others...
I like your ties that grind, M.Zee. There was a character shift (??) from the first to the second, sort of like a time lapse or a double life. Could be growing old, or better, when the 'honeymoon is over.'
I liked this prompt, it was fun to work with and I learned.
And oh yes, I am not a total tea totaler, that was just part of my poem. But a six pack of beer is likely to last a whole month in our house.
..
"the heart work"… yes, honestly, if I DIDN"T love them… So witty, so clever, so true! Love it.
that close just finishes us off, MZ ~
What I love about this poem is the sonnet-like feel to it - and how remarkable that you have written it in 55 words. Your subject of 'heart work' is expressed with poignant care for both people in the story, and the family as a whole that must suffer the hard times.
Both sides of the home coin...
The sense of being racked and stretched to the breaking point fills this, and as Kerry has said, amazing so much musicality and lyric lines accompany it, all in 55 words. To everything, there is a season, MZ...you can follow those lines out without me quoting them at you--I always find that idea, that all things come to us, and all things pass, comforting.
So nice to meet you!!
Enjoyed your poem for its intrigue and familiarity. Especially love the entire second stanza.
Poppy
This is personal and yet it is so relate-able...love the heartwork and the mention of guilt...poignant work, MZ!
"ties that grind" I certainly get that. I feel this piece and I have lived it also. Great write!
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