I am in control.
You're a shadow hanging back
and recording your observations
of the sugar in my sap.
Measuring the heat
held deep in my ceramic bones.
Watching clouds creep clockwise
to make my stormy mouth their home.
You are just a variable.
You're an ex in search of why.
Record your observations.
Hypothesize.
A Flash Fiction 55 for Real Toads
Saturday, November 1, 2014
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About Me
- Maude Lynn
- Anybody who has survived his childhood has enough information about life to last him the rest of his days. ---Flannery O'Connor
16 comments:
Oh, yes!! Another good one that says it all without filling an entire page! I love it!! Hope your weekend is going well, MZ!
Phenomenal. Especially the part about the clouds.
Hmm. What is control, anyway? I'm sure it's not in our record keeping and calibrations. This reads like a riddle (what has creramic bones). But it makes me think of the live things and forces we measure and how they must laugh.
I absolutely love the wordplay here. I read it three times just because.
Dang, you just keep on rocking. Love it.
Hi Mama Zen! Thanks for hosting a Flash 55.
Yours is wonderful, tightly controlled, and I love the last four lines, how you used ex rather than X.
Ah, excellent! I love your word combinations and unique images:
the sugar in my sap
ceramic bones
my stormy mouth
Oh Mama Z. this is soooo good!
you're an ex in search of why?!?!?!?!
PERFECT.
Alot of cliches so unlike you. But, I always enjoy your site.
ZQ
WOW! I read it more than once too, in order to take it all in. Spectacular.
love this, MZ ~
So clever the "ex in search of why," x and y not lost on me ;) love that!
Strong voice MZ ~ Love it ~
a mysterious 55 - I can read this several ways as I'm not sure what you mean exactly - but that isn't what reading poetry is always about. This can speak to many people in different ways. Nice.
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