Shadows skitter atop
my canopy bed,
and heads hang
over the side -
moon sliver eyes
peering
through flouncy pink ruffles.
Fast! I muffle
my little girl screams
(with pillows, with shame),
take big girl aim
with my Monster Spray
WhimperWhisper
AWAY
BEGONE
and learn monsters always stay
till dawn
when a girl's alone.
For Open Link Night at dVerse
Tuesday, September 25, 2012
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About Me
- Maude Lynn
- Anybody who has survived his childhood has enough information about life to last him the rest of his days. ---Flannery O'Connor
43 comments:
ooh, ouch, now I will never want to sleep in a canopy bed!
Yep, I slept in one once and sure enough .....
i love the idea with the monster spray but then...i guess you're right...
There you go again, Mama Zen. Another fabulous piece. I love the shortness of it. The constriction makes every word, thought, expression come alive; like pinapple sprinkled liberally in a tossed salad. Wonderful work this piece my friend, wonderfu.
Canopy beds made for dreaming and certainly for poetry...nice write!
Great edginess to this.
I love the colors you pull out with this active piece. downright awakening!
Interesting poem, makes me question if I want to sleep in a canopy bed
You captured so well the monsters we knew as children. I wonder, now, if there is not one still in my closet?
Phew..... monsters in the bedroom are not welcome (to me) at any time of day, or night...LOL Very effective write MZ.
Had to ask Chloe what a canopy bed is...I think from what she said, it's a four poster?
Love this!
reminds me of a movie i saw in my teens called 13 Ghosts - it too involved a Canopy Bed...tense...bkm
Ouch...powerful write.
This drew me in immediately like a whispering, shhh...come listen.
And the ending caught me off guard.
When i saw the excorcist as a child(yeah, no shit! Who takes a kid to the excorcist?) for two yrs i would run and jump into my bed from six ft away, sure demons were hiding under it. And the lights stayed on.
But me thinks you speak here os a different monster.
~rick
What delicious fear and scariness. Love the "shadows skitter atop my canopy bed." The whole thing is delightful.
those monsters scare big and little girls - spray - be gone - able to enjoy that adorable canopy bed xx Lib
Love flouncy pink ruffles!
Oh. So THAT'S where my canopy bed I wanted was. YOU had it!
oy, so that is why my keeps a knife under the pillow while i am away...almost cut my finger off once...smiles...nice verse MZ
I'm alone tonight...I shall watch for monsters.
I always wanted a flouncy canopy bed when I was a child... Now, reading this I'm feeling I didn't miss out... Though I was always scared of my wardrobe!
Very cool poem - very creative yet universal. k.
Those monsters are sometimes VERY persistent! I've dealt with a few.......
My monsters hung out in the closet. In the mornings, they looked just like shirts. Eventually they went to someone else's house, I guess...this poem was a lot of fun. Nice job.
So vivid and true.
i think i'll sleep on the sofa....
{smile}
♥
very cool MZ. Love the way the monsters become alive, somewhere I heard that to conquer fear, oust one's demons, monsters, you first have to address them, and that thought struck me reading this. Very strong piece. thanks
Love it!!!!!
I ALWAYS wanted a canopy bed when I was a little girl. Yeah, this would have gotten me over it much sooner. I liked the contrast of the pink and the monsters. :)
Eeeek! At first I thought it was going to be cute kitties or something...and then...eeek!
(I had a canopy bed when little...but my monsters chose to stay underneath...or in the closet.)
The monsters always know when you're alone, no matter how big you get. Good one, MZ.
YOU ... have the power to chase away those monsters. I know. I enjoyed your poem.
Loved moon silver eyes and monster spray. Once when my niece and nephew were spending the night here, they worried over monsters. My pest control guy became a hero because I reminded them that Jim came and sprayed closets and under beds and everywhere and that his main job was to keep monsters away. It worked! Jim thought it a riot. I thoroughly enjoyed your poem.
I love this and imagining you fighting monsters! So cute :D
The kid in us comes out whenever the word monster is used...oooh...moon silver eyes..nice
Yep... I've encountered a few myself.I put them to work cleaning the house. I told them if they were going to keep coming here, they've got to pitch in!
This is a great poem. It definitely reminds me of my childhood.
That's a great first stanza. It sets up the sense of the bed as the vehicle for dreaming perfectly. I like 'moon silver eyes'; it's a gloriously unsettling image!
Yours get on top of the canopy> Yikes! Mine are always under the bed, and if I stay dead center on the bed, they can't reach me. For some reason, my husband has an issue with that...
Real scary, without seeming to be at first.
Very creative. Made me think of a time when I was alone, scared and yes, the monsters were with me all night. Very good write.
"peering
through flouncy pink ruffles" ... I like. :)
My monster had big eyes as well and eat toes left too far down the bed
Hmmm... now I'm thinking! Canopy bed is out...
nice OLN!
weekend hugs
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