As I empty
of all there is
to remember,
to forget,
will I rattle like a stone in a sieve,
or will my sleep be dreamless?
For the "dementia" prompt at Real Toads
Friday, June 8, 2012
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About Me
- Maude Lynn
- Anybody who has survived his childhood has enough information about life to last him the rest of his days. ---Flannery O'Connor
25 comments:
Let's hope it would be dreamless.
Wouldn't it be nice to be 'empty' of all thought sometimes :)
To sleep, NOT to dream. I'd go for that once in a blue moon. Nice write, ms. poet. xo
Ahh... very thought-provoking, MZ. Thanks for taking part in the prompt.
dreamless sleep seems much more appealing than the rattling thing alright ... succinct but powerful
http://leapinelephants.blogspot.ca/2012/06/over-dinner.html
You image of a person emptying of all they are is incredibly moving, and gives your readers pause to imagine this happening to them too.
We go between to remember and to forget..love how you wrote on the topic.
What a thought-provoking question.
I love it and no one says it better!
I picture the dreams of a person with Alzheimer's as being excruciating. I pray I am wrong.
"Will I rattle like a stone in a sieve" is an incredible image...
Yeah, 'cause they all know that "an empty barrel makes the most noise," huh?
I'd rather make the noise, defying TS Eliot's "Wasteland"--though on a slightly different topic: “This is the way the world ends / Not with a bang but a whimper.” Bang Bang!
What a way cool perspective on the prompt! "as I empty".......I can HEAR the pebbles rattling around in my head already............
ohhhh (claps hands excitedly) I like this little gem. Normally I don't poems that are questions, but you presented is so tightly >>> I feel as though I am peeking into a journal entry or even telepathically hearing someone's private thoughts.
pardon the intrusion, but thanks!
Very Cool. To remember to forget, really like the contrast in those lines as well as Sleep be dreamless. Very cool MZ. Thanks
I wish for the dreamless sleep and to forget. haunting.
Wow, such an apt metaphor for that empty of thought and memory...stone in a sieve rattling about. Excellent brevity...powerful write.
As as deeply as I wish dreamless sleep for those suffering with dementia, I know better. Nightmares, night terrors, hallucinations are so much a part of this dreadful disease. Your poem packs quite a punch!!
Really lovely and foreboding.
Oh, wow, this really hits home. "As I empty of all there is to remember" feels like it is happening already, but my doctor says it isn't. Apparently, as long as I'm worried about dementia, I don't have it.
Well done. I love the way you write so few words with so much meaning.
K
This has so much impact. Sometimes the journey into dementia is harder than being there. Some souls (not all) seem pretty happy most of the time. Doesnt mean I want to go there, though. It is also very hard on the family members to see a loved one slip away like that....
The stone in the sieve is inspired writing.
ooooh that is the question, isn't it? excellent.
This was profound!
this. is. magic. all.
a haunting description, MZ! {sigh} i love your writing!
♥
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