I wrote a poem and had lines leftover.
Now, they're rattling around like a box full of bones.
Stretch me out.
Smooth me like parchment.
Banging my brain for a verse to call home.
But, the rhyme has been written,
and the tale's filled the page.
Ink me with henna.
Ink me with want.
So, leftover lines you'll just have to wait.
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Tuesday, November 15, 2011
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About Me
- Maude Lynn
- Anybody who has survived his childhood has enough information about life to last him the rest of his days. ---Flannery O'Connor
39 comments:
I think line clippings littering the floor is a sign of a good poet. I do feel sorry for the little lost bits though. :)
Don't you hate to leave perfectly goodlines out??? Ingenious to make them fuel another (witty and clever) poem.
Somehow this bounces off the William Stafford poem, or Hedgewitch's intro to tonight's OneStop Pub: what to do with what was left out, and what do with what was kept? Middle and edges of the poem both deserve notice; I'm glad someone wrote a poem about the leftovers and then tossing them away. - Brendan
I enjoy the contrast of your 1st stanza's verbs, bang and rattle vs. smooth and stretch, and then how in the 2nd the ink-fill-write all flow together.
Just don't throw them away. You never know when those left overs will be just right and seasoned enough to use in something else you concoct. Sounds like a recipe. lol
Nice piece from you MZ
Love the name Leftover (lines)...sometimes they are the best ones waiting for their moment...bkm
haha sometimes leftovers can come in handy and are just dandy.
Sometimes leftovers make a wonderful meal all of their own :)
I've got a few 'orphans' lingering myself.
I think this poem is an oxymoron. I've had worse meals from leftovers, anyway.
I love leftovers--this is great!
Ooh, I love this: "Ink me with henna."
I also feel so sad for leftover lines and hate to cut them. But some taste better as midnight snacks. Extra lines can kill a poem.
Make sure you use them within five days. If not, throw them out!
Alright...this is a cute, lovely, and very readable piece.
Your rhyming is excellent, and the who idea about left over words in need of a home is brilliant.
good job.
"like a box full of bones"
I love leftovers.
ha i got notebooks full of those...and somedays i get to them before the mold...
I really do like this, MZ!
Wow, this describes my mind more than you can know. It's like you as an author feel a responsibility to these leftovers, which you genuinely want to help out, yet something new appears and leftovers remain leftovers. Thanks, really enjoyed this a lot
Great write, MZ.
Inking sounds so desirable when you say it; I'll take your leftover lines any day!
Aaaw, very quaint. I like :)
Put those loose words in a hat, shake them up and voila, a new poem!!
much enjoyed!!
Leftover lines -- put them in a box, they might grow into poems on their own over time. :D Love it.
Sometimes they resonate just find on their own short little selves...and sometimes, those clippings will find a new creative home months on down the line. Never a bad thing to have the occasional little orphan verbiage...
smiles..i have some of these leftover lines lying around as well..and sometimes i find a place to fit them in...some fit never..but oh i hear their screams...
I love the directness of your work, how you manage a deceptive simplicity of phrasing, ever choosing just the right words.. xxxxj
so true of what us poets go through when penning our works... :)
Oh!!! lovely... the way you have smoothed the left over lines... some times they leave a strange feeling of unloved...
Shashi
ॐ नमः शिवाय
Om Namah Shivaya
http://shadowdancingwithmind.blogspot.com/2011/11/whispers-where-you-will-go.html
Throw them down on paper
and wait
They'll squiggle, they'll crawl
They'll bond, they'll combine
They'll fall in love,
and they'll form another poem :)
Cheers,
Arnab Majumdar
ScribbleFest.com
Very clever. Wouldn't it be great to feast on them? But too often they lose their flavor.
a line in need is a line indeed! So many fragments just wanting to be used and abused. I cherish the unfinished more than the overdone :) fantastic write, which I think we all relate to!
A short, sweet command for all our leftover lines. Sometimes they're lonely, sometimes they're sassy. Good to remind them who's boss.
Gene
I'm always a little concerned when those lines start nagging me. I mean, they didn't want to fit in with the rest of the poem, what makes them think they'd make it in another venue? Great fun.
I wrote a poem and had lines leftover.
Now, they're rattling around like a box full of bones
Great intro mama love the idea behind this one. Nice write
I think this is terrific! (Only I would remove 'just' from last line, to make it as strong as the rest of the piece. Hope you don't mind the suggestion.)
sometimes my lines like to hide under my bed or in the closet...they make me work hard to lure them out :)
I like it! Keep it up
Clever limerick little things.
I like this very much. The tongue planted firmly in the ink! Your poems always entice me. Great!
Fun!
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